But what exactly does that mean? We know what that phrase typically means in the world of Mommy Wars, but I am not going there with this post. I said my piece on Mothers Judging Mothers a few weeks back, plus every blogger in the world has also said their piece on the subject. That is not the point of this post.
The point of this post is to explore the famous quote above. The title ‘Working Mother’ is a very redundant one. I don’t know a single mother who doesn’t completely work her ass off from morning till night.
It does not matter at all whether you work in the home or out of it, as a mom, we all work hard. We’re up at the crack of dawn to get ourselves ready – typically only to have the kids wake up 5 minutes later. We endure absolute chaos until their are dressed, fed, off to school/daycare or starting their morning activities at home.
Then we go to work. We either try to salvage the cleanliness of our houses and restore order for a few hours. Or we continue taking care of young children at home; keeping them entertained, learning, fed, alive… Or to a day job, where we can deal with the demands and deadlines of someone other than our kids for 8 hours.
*In honour of full disclosure, I work outside the home. I f’ing love my job. True story! I work with/for wonderful people in a fast paced but encouraging environment & it’s great. I am the typical overachieving, driven Capricorn, so I always knew going back to work would be my choice.
When the ‘working day’ is over, the chaos ensues again – snack, homework/activities, dinner, bath, bed – all of which run the risk of being carried out in the form of mini battles forged during one great war known as the evening. Once they are finally in bed, we can sit back and relax.
Ha! No, no. I’m totally screwing with you.
This is where the next shift kick in, around 8 or 9 or 10 pm (depending on how well bedtime went). We walk around examining the damage and picking up toys, clothes, dishes, etc. – I have a toddler, so one day this part will be easier because she will pick up after herself. That is what happens right?! Tell me this is true!! – Then we head to the laundry room to try desperately to tackle some of the mountain we find there.
Many mothers then take time to get a head start on lunches for the next day; the kids, theirs, their husbands (Haha! Ya right…he’s a grown man. Fend for yourself! – Love you babe…). This is something I have been trying to do more off. Especially now with Lilly being diagnosed with Celiacs Disease. Food is no longer an easy task in our house.
Once all of this is done, and we’re staring at 10 or 11 pm on the clock, then we can settle in with a smartphone or computer and try to reconnect with the outside adult world for just a mere few moments. We facebook, tweet, pin all the things, or blog and try to find solace in the comfort of other mothers we find online in the final few hours of the day.
We collectively chat about our mommydom to each other and give one another the needed pats on the back in the form or retweets and facebook likes. We soothe ourselves as we rock in our corners with mild PTSD. Time slips away and it’s midnight or later when we finally drag our butts to bed, laying awake with lists in our heads, waiting for it to start all over again.
The most ideal part about all of this? We wouldn’t change a damn thing.
Yandie, Goddess of Pickles. says
I’m still waiting for that whole ‘cleans up after themselves’ thing to kick in. Just kidding, my girls are getting much better, but still require a lot of haranguing to put their stuff back where it goes. Much easier now that more stuff actually has a place to go.
The downside of them doing stuff for themselves is having to make sure they have actually done them. Otherwise you get “Did you make your lunch?” “Yup” Later: “I’m So Hungry! I didn’t have any lunch!” It’s hard not to fall into the its-easier-just-to-do-it-myself trap because then they just never learn.
I think in reference to the silly ‘mommy wars’ employed mom might be more accurate, because every decent mom is a “working” mom. If you’re not working, you’re probably doing it wrong. (Or you’re doing it very, very right.)
great post! I am not a mom myself, but I enjoyed reading what you had to say and your opinions, thoughts and funny moments.
I am a stay at home mom and agree that either way you slice it (at home or at work), moms have long days. I actually find that women are not very judgemental about whether you go back or stay at home and are actually very supportive of my choice and others. Maybe I just have great friends and family. But I digress…..As I read your post about collapsing in bed at the end of the day and checking our email/facebook/etc., I realized how nice it is that we can do this from our bed with our smartphones. Imagine having to sit upright at your computer and do it – I’d be too tired!